i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
See what happens when I don't get laid? I make poor life decisions, like buying baby ducks.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
wow bdsm is so cute
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
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