Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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