Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
