Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
