Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
you mean i was at the winter classic?
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
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