Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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