You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
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