How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
