Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Randomize
