i just google imaged poop.
before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
The air taste purple.
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