Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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