i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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