Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
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