She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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