just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
