When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
