you guys were way drunker than both of me
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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