Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(734): View more from Michigan

I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building

Fav 2 3940 933
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(847): View more from Illinois

My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo

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(860): View more from Connecticut

Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal

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(703): View more from Virginia

I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang

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(205): View more from Alabama

So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.

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(709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!

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