i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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