He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I should have robbed the cradle years ago. Turns out 21 year old boys can cum and still fuck me silly a minute later. My vagina feels like it just won a car from Oprah!
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