Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
I believe in your delicious
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Randomize
