Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
Randomize
