its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
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