i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
