Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Still dying that you shit outside
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
Randomize
