I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
