OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
i like him enough to wash my sheets.. but not enough to finally get that pink lemonade and vodka slushy stain out of my carpet
Randomize
