watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
He passed out mid-signature
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
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