its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
don't judge my taste in strippers
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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