at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
