Your tits are I can't wait for
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
Randomize
