there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
