I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
