and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
Randomize
