marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
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