I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Randomize
