Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
I would say that that is the last time I ever drink a bottle of jack in two hours, but really who am I kidding?
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
