on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
