that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
