I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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