we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
I just found puke in my bra..
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize