dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Randomize
