I just realized I haven't had steady access to a woman's body since I was breastfeeding.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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