How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
Randomize
