That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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