all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
You pole danced in your parka.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Holy shit dude........stairs
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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