erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Randomize
