Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
