Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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