Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
Randomize
